Everything I Can't Say

Dear __________,

My better half loves you still. Wishes you the best. Wishes you will continue to live your life the way you please, without a care in the world, without another obstacle in your way. My better half hopes and prays that when this is all done, you'll think fondly of "our" past, of me. Then turn around and... never. look. back. (This half hopes that it can do the same).

My worse half disdains you for everything you are worth. Disdains you for the predicaments you put me in I put myself in because of you. For the "I love you's" and even worse for the reasons. Wishes you the worst, wishes it could decide whether to believe or reject everything you say. This half wishes that when this all over, you would just disappear.

I still can't decide what half could put up with being just a "good friend."
But just like you, I just want to get better.
I want to be the one that matters.
So when this is all over, I'm saying goodbye.

Sincerely,
Brittney Lahela Badayos